The Ramblings of Denira

I’ve been reading a lot of blogs lately that the writer talks about their favorite pastor so today I’m going to talk about mine.  My favorite pastor is…..(drum roll please)…..Pastor Bobby Williams!!! Okay, Okay I know I’m a little biased, but I think my Pastor is amazing.  I will never forget when Bobby told me that he was feeling like God was telling him to plant a church. I was driving and almost killed us both by running off the road.  To say that I was less than thrilled to hear this statement come from his mouth would be a understatement. I loved working in student ministry with him.  I love leading my high school girls small group, ministring to high schoolers, going on trips with the kids, and everything else that goes along with student ministry. I had planned on us doing this for the rest of our lives, until Bobby made that statement.  I’m thankful for the journey that God has put us on and I would not want to go through it with anyone else.  I know that I have not always been the most supportive wife and I still have no idea how to be a pastor’s wife, but I’m working hard at getting better.

Bobby, I just want you to know that I love you, I’m proud of you and I support you in this journey!!!!

So the weatherman is calling for snow tomorrow? Is it going to happen? This morning the national weather services said we could possibly get between 4-8 inches!!! I would be so happy!!! ) There is nothing else I would rather do this weekend then be stuck in my house, fire place blazing, wrapped up in my snuggie watching the snow fall outside!!! It will also be so much fun to see Isaiah in some real snow!!! I went to the grocery store yesterday, got the sleds ready and now all I need is for it to not get to warm! 

I’ll keep you posted on how it shapes up!!!!!!!!

As of January 1st Bobby is now a full time pastor.  When we first planted the church, Bobby was bivocational.  Almost a year later, as a church, we are now able to have him as a full time pastor! We are very excited about this!! I know Bobby is going to do a great job and that God is going to use him in so many ways!!   Just to let you into a little secret though, this is all a little scary for me. Anyone that knows me, knows that I love to be in control and I struggle with giving up that control.  I know that God is going to bless us and take care of us, but I find myself worrying a lot. Half of our income is now based on the church and sometimes I let myself stress and worry about the what ifs.  I have no doubt in the world that we are exactly where God wants us to be. I just need to keep reminding myself of that. Anyway, I’m sure that this will be a crazy ride and I’m looking forward to all God is going to teach me throught this process!!!

I did not blog over the holidays so I’ve got some stuff to catch up on. I sat down to blog several times, but then was distracted. So here are some things from Christmas Break,

• loved my 2 weeks off from work
• had a blast watching Isaiah open his Christmas presents. 
• started planning a yard sale for the spring for all of Isaiah’s old toys because he has now taken over my dining room, living room and spare room with his toys! )
• Had a blast hanging out with Bobby who was at home with us most of the time
• Christmas Rock Night was awesome. We had around 300 ppl in attendance. You can read more about it here.
• Went to Dollywood with my mom, dad and the kids. Had such a great time and Isaiah rode his first rides!
• Spent New Year’s at John and Julie’s with the Robbins and Melissa.
• Decided not to make a New Years resolution this year because I forget them by the end of Jan.
• made the decision that I’m going to go back to school and get my teaching certification. Don’t know if I will use it, but if my current job goes away I would like to stay in the school system.
• Glad that Deena decided to start blogging again!
• Really getting into using coupons and searching the computer for coupons before I buy anything. It’s almost like a game now!!! I have found some awesome money saving websites if anyone is interested!

Wow, I’m sure there’s more but I can’t really think of anything.  Below if a picture of Isaiah from Christmas. I feel like I’ve not put any up of him lately!!  Hope everyone had a great Christmas!

So I haven’t really posted lately, but it just seems like I have nothing interesting or entertaining to talk about.  Life has just been busy and crazy, but at the same time boringly (word?) normal.  Nothing new to update you on! So here are just some random thoughts to have something to post on my blog!!!

- So excited for Matt and Deena and them finding out they are having a little girl! Can’t wait to meet little Leeland!

- Ready for Christmas break which starts on Friday. I LOVE my job and am so blessed to have it, but always look forward to my breaks.

- Went to an awesome training in Nashville this week.  Learned alot of good stuff that will help not just with my job, but with being a parent and in our church.

- At the training we talked about kids have webs of support and needing at least 5 anchors. Made me think about my 5 anchors growing up and who is already in Isaiah’s life to be an anchor!

-I feel like i haven’t hung out with my friends lately and am really missing Girl’s Night!

- I missed Bobby and Isaiah terribly while I was gone. I never get use to being away from them

- I worry too much and am constantly stuggling to leave things in God’s hands.

- I need to be more focused on other things and less focused on myself and my getting my own needs met

- I can’t believe there are only20 days left in this year. Does time go by faster when we get older!!!

i guess that’s about it for now!

I ran across this picture that Bobby sent me a month ago or so. This is the company that Bobby works for.  They used Isaiah’s picture for advertisement at the last trade show they went to!

Here are some of Isaiah’s 1 year pics! I’ve got more to edit then I’ll put more up!

I was reading back over some past blogs and I came across this song that I had posted a couple days after I had a miscarriage. You can read the whole post here.

And though I can’t understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how You’ve brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames
After all this has passed
I still will remain
After I’ve cried my last
There’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today
Someday I’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

It made me think about how broken I was during that time.  How sad and confused I was. During that time though, I clinged to the promise that God had plans for my life.  I camped out in Psalm 37:7 says “Rest in the LORD and wait patiently for Him” and that’s what we did. We waited on the Lord.

Fast Forward to now.  We have Isaiah. Our beautiful, healthy one year old.  A part of me will always grieve for the baby that we lost, but I know that if we had that baby, we would not have Isaiah now.  The thought of not having him makes my stomach turn. 

All this to say, God did what he says he will do and He knows what is best for our lives.  Jeremiah 29:11 says “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” How true is that!!! God knew the plan for our lives. He knew what was best for us and he knew the joy we would find in Isaiah.

 The above song gave me so much comfort during that time. I would listen to it over and over and sing it to myself when I got emotional and sad. however, I don’t think I fully understood the truth to it until now.  “Though it won’t be today, someday I’ll hope agaian and there’ll be beauty from pain, You will bring beauty from my pain.  Isaiah is that beauty.

Bobby and I moved into a new house a couple of weeks ago. We all know that with moving comes some extra expenses….paying deposits, getting everything set up and buying things needed for the new place. Bobby and I had some money put back for our fall break vacation and rather than dipping into savings we decided to use that for the extra expenses and stay close to home for fall break. A little bummed that we were not getting to go to the beach we knew we were doing the responsible thing. Thursday before my fall break started Bobby got up early to go meet with the rest of the lead team at panera for breakfast. While he was there, the lead team presented him with a gift of sending us to charleston for several days during fall break, all expenses paid!!!! It was such a surprise and we are so thankful for that . So of we went to charleston (I will post about that later). Well Monday rolled around and it was back to work as normal…. Except bobbys truck would not start. He ended up getting it to the dealership who told us it would be almost $700 to fix. Again not wanting to use our savings I panicked. I called around and found another place to fix it for about half that cost….. But still that’s alot of money. The mechanic that we took it to said there was a slight chance that it could be something easier like a loose wire which would be super cheap to fix. So I prayed for that. I asked God to let it be the cheaper one and begged for it. The next day the mechanic called while I was at work and it is going to cost $350. Kinda bummed about it, i accepted that was the plan and moved on. Later in the day I found out that something I had been trying to sell had finally sold… Yay only $90 but that was $90 that I didn’t have to take from savings. Well when I got home that day I checked my mail and in it was a letter from my insurance company stating that there had been a mistake in my poilcy And I was being credited $220!!! How does this happen!?!?!?!?

I share all that to get to the lesson. When we found out how much it was going to be I prayed for God to change it. To change the circumstances, to remove the barrier, the uncomfortable sitation, the obstacle, to put me where I wanted to be. Instead I should have prayed that despite the barrier and situation for God to provide my needs to get through it. I mean that’s exactly what he did. Sometimes God wants us to face barriers, challenges, uncomfortable situations. During these times we see how much he provides if we don’t run from it. So instead of looking to avoid these sitations or asking for God to take them away, ask Him to provide what u need to get through them!! Then praise and glorify Him for doing so!!!

What situation do u need God’s provisions in, instead of being removed from?